You want the birth story? It's pretty straight forward and everything I prayed for it to be even with a couple of complications near the end. I'll spare you the details! I wasn't sure what going into labour without being induced would feel like so early Sunday morning when I woke around 5 am I thought, "mmm, these could be contractions". Yup, they were and they progressed quickly. My mom was summoned, another pastor called to preach (because of course, Lucas knows his daddy's Sunday mornings are generally busy) and our midwife waited for us at the hospital. A friend came to the rescue to watch the two big kids and we were off.
Everything progressed as it is supposed to -- I even was able to read my book between contractions for an hour or so! Around 10, I heard my midwife on the phone with the anesthesiologist saying I didn't need an epidural. What?! She said I could do it without and in hindsight, she was right although that last hour was pretty intense. My water was broke and labour continued in all seriousness. The next hour was excruciating ... but ended with a baby who decided a few more minutes in the womb would be good accompanied by a few minutes of panic but resulting in a beautifully perfect wee man born with his fist tight to his head and placed on my chest. There was a few more minutes of action before everything settled down and I was encouraged to hand back the laughing gas -- which by the way, doesn't reduce or numb the pain but certainly made me breathe through it all. It was over and my baby, my SON, was here without blemish and in excellent health.
We were able to come home the next day once his blood sugars stabilized and it's been non-stop since. Lucas, while adorable and handsome, is a fussy baby. For the first two months he wanted to be held almost all the time and often even when held, he cried. I was exhausted and give thanks to God for an amazing husband, mostly well behaved big kids and family and friends who brought food and kept me company. I am especially thankful for our moms who came for days at a time and kept my household going. But through it all, all I can think of is how amazing this small person who dominates my world is.
I am so in love with this baby and fall more in love with him everyday. He smiles with his whole body -- especially his eyes. My husband calls him, "My boy!" and is a natural with this tiny human. His big sister adores and mothers him gently encouraging him to talk and smile (always asking me to, "watch this mom!") and is always willing to hold him even if he is crying. His big brother squeezes his legs and whacks him with stuffed animals eliciting belly laughs from both boys. I watch all with a full heart.
But three kids ... whew!
~ I wondered how my heart would be able to love a third child as much as the first two.
~ I wondered how I would be able to put all three kids to bed on my own on occasion.
~ I wondered how I would have the strength to get through each day in one piece.
I do (mostly).
~ I wondered how my arms could hold three little people.
~ I wondered how groceries and meals would appear in my fridge and on my table.
Everyday is a gift from God and while I still wonder about a lot of things, I know that He is by my side through both the intensity and calmness of motherhood. Each day is an adventure and we are getting the hang of being a family of five.
Lucas is here and he's lovely.